I think one of the main problems in relationships is probably a lack of communication/effort. And honestly, can you blame people in the world today for that? I think some people are just too sensitive.
For example: The other day Josh & I were talking and he told me that at some point in our relationship, he really wanted to just give up and get out. And actually, I can identify with that. But, I am a dedicated person and this is what I chose. I think at some point of everyone’s relationship, they may end up feeling that way. I think that this is true because, you transition from always trying to impress someone, to being more comfortable around them. In addition, living together takes adjustments.
Now, this could have hurt my feelings and I could have made it an issue. But, why? You know what that says to me? ‘Hey, at some point you became too human and I didn’t like it. But, I love you so I stuck it out because, I had faith it would get better. And it did.’ That’s what it is all about. That’s unconditional love. Unless someone is hurting you and/or your family, don’t give up. Unless, of course, they put no effort into bettering your relationship WITH YOU (it’s no one’s responsibility alone). In these cases, you deserve someone who will try with you.
I once read that marriages now a days don’t last because, ‘people are lazy & just throw them away and get new ones. As opposed to fixing what’s broken.” Now, obviously that does not stand true to everyone but, I don’t think it’s too far from the truth.
Joshua and I definitely don’t always agree. Our visions tend to be quiet different from one and other’s. Our brains were actually cut from completely different molds..and there is not one ounce of doubt about that. Sometimes we even have to remind each other that neither of us can read minds..thus, have no idea what the other is thinking, until it is stated clearly, outloud. (I guess we aren’t that different after all) We have gone through our fair share of misunderstandings and disagreements. We still do. Sometimes, something as simple as, how we have interpreted a line in a movie, can lead to a heated debate. We both have hard heads and we quiet often both think we are the one who is correct. (Silly, I know. Of course, I’m always right(; ) But, we have learned to communicate through that. We have accepted that we are two different people and we are not required to always agree. And though, often, we still leave our conversations secretly thinking we are the one who is right..we know that it really doesn’t matter. Or, maybe there’s more than one correct answer even. Sometimes, I think we just feed off of debate energy. Whatever it is, however it is handled, I am sure of one thing..
I trust that I’ve finally found someone who won’t give up on me, regardless of what I/we have going on. And, I love him a whole lot. So, I’m going to stick by his side, no matter what. Because, that’s what love is. Don’t take it for granted. No one is perfect. You definitely are not perfect, nor am I. So, why would we expect our partner to be? Isn’t that the one person we should love enough to look past their flaws anyway?
My brother is my best friend in the whole world. When he died in 2012, Joshua was my biggest supporter. I felt like a piece of my heart died with my brother. Josh did everything that he possibly could to understand what I was going through, keep me up when it was bringing me down, and try as hard as possible to fill that empty space in my heart with something happy. Little did I know, it would only be a short year, until I returned the favor.
In March of 2013, Josh’s father was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer, primary unknown. The doctors gave him a year. In November of 2013, my future father-in-law passed away. This was and still is one of the hardest things Joshua has ever gone through. He not only lost his father, merely a year after we lost my brother..but, he gained great responsibility from the business his father owned and had not prepared him completely to run. I’ve had to take a leave from my new and exciting world full of color, hair, & make-up to help him in his copy machine business.
Is it as much fun? No. Is it just as fulfilling to know I am doing an irreplacable favor to the one man I truly love? Yes. So, this is where we are as of now
3 years may seem simple. But, we have endured so much in that time. We have withstood it together. I am not sure how and in what ways it would be different if I was alone. But, I do know how hard it was with Josh by my side. And, that makes me very concious to the fact that I am not sure if I could have handled it alone. And I feel so incredible blessed that I did not have to. Because, I have my flawed, copy-machine man…and he’s my hero. His armor may not be shiny and his sword may look more like a USB. He is not perfect and will never be (regardless of what he claims, lol)…despite this, nothing will ever change the fact that he is my savior. I am grateful for this man who is so different from me, yet so much the same; in so many ways. I am so thankful for my right-hand man. I know he will always be where he belongs. Not, in front, behind, above, or below me..but, right by my side.
If you have the pleasure of having found this in your lifetime…Respect it. Cherish it. Build on it. I hope, for your own sake, you take every opportunity to be thankful for the blessing of finding someone who not only understands you & loves you but, also loves you enough to continue being there..even when they don’t understand you.
All I know is, I am so proud of the union Josh & I have become. I feel incredibly blessed to have someone that I honestly don’t even have to feel like worrying about being left alone or not made to feel loved. We’ve been through A LOT in these past 3+ years. We still are going through plenty & he was always there with me. Through every. last. thing. & I, with him. That’s hard to find now a days.
So, if you have someone. One of those people who you know, even if you lost EVERYTHING, they’d still be there so you didn’t have to lose it all alone…maybe, you should go home today & do something to make sure they know that you are grateful and the feeling is mutual. Because, you’re both very lucky people.
And as unlucky as I am sometime..I am one very lucky, very blessed woman.